Only If You Stay
by Jaded Kitten
Summary: He's heart was closed off to everyone, never letting anyone get to close. Not wanting to ever feel the pain he faced again, but what happens when someone gets closer than he expected. Will he let them in? Or will he push them even further away?
1. Within these hollow walls

Wow this is my first attempt at a gravi fic and I'm a little nervous on how people will react to it...considering my friend posted a great story and no one really reviews...so if you like it...review...that's the only way I'll post more...

Disclaimer: No sadly I don't own any rights or characters of Gravi...wish I did...hmmmmm...I have a plan...mumbles Gravi will be mine...dissappears in a swirl of blue and silver glittery hearts

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**Her POV**

I sat up in bed clutching the sheets to my bare skin, staring at his form as he sat on the edge. Everyday since the night he allowed me in his home, in his bed, he has done this.

I crawled over to him, wrapping my legs around his waist, resting my chin on his shoulder.

"What's wrong?" He remained silent. I sighed. "Why won't you let me in?" He stood, leaning his body against the wall before staring into my eyes with those same pain filled eyes that I, and only I, saw in the privacy of these walls. No one ever saw the side of him that I did. The person filled with so much heartache and sadness. My head fell, wanting to be apart of his world, freeing him from his hurt but knowing it would never happen.

His hand caressed the side of my face wiping away my tears with his thumb.

"Ryu, I…" His lips pressed against mine, stopping me from finishing my statement. Another tear streamed down my cheek. It was always like this, he never allowed those words to pass my lips. No matter how true they were.

He laid me back on the bed, trailing soft kisses down my neck towards my navel were his tongue played and teased. I opened my eyes to see him staring at me, gliding his tongue towards my lips. His tongue brushing my lips before penetrating them, intertwining his tongue with mine.

I don't know if what we did would be considered love making. Even though my feelings and emotions were in it, his weren't. His eyes were empty as if he was so far away and unable for me to touch. It was just him screwing me as if I meant nothing to him or the year we've spent together.

I didn't want to feel like some meaningless woman, maybe that's all I am to him. I felt like I was in a one sided relationship, the thought making me want to cry. Not even in this aspect of our relationship could he show some sign that I was wanted and needed, I was shut off.

I lied there, feeling more distant from him than ever before. I had nothing of him and he had everything of me, yet he refused it. Did someone injure him so deeply and so harshly that he couldn't and wouldn't let anyone like me in? As if reading my mind, Ryu rested his head on my stomach, holding me tightly as if I would run away otherwise. I gently caressed his hair, beginning to fall asleep.

**Ryu's POV**

I sat there thinking about that night. Why couldn't I change the outcome, why did it have to end like that? I can't escape the pain of it, it taunts my dreams…my life. I ran my fingers through my untamed mane. At that point I felt her arms wrap around me, the warmth of her breath on my neck as she asked me what was wrong. Every night this happens and every night I wish I could just let it all go, to finally let her in. I rose from my spot, resting my head against the wall as I tried to block out the hurt in her voice of me not telling her, yet again, of what's wrong with me.

I don't know if I'm truly ready to let her in, to open up to her like she wants me to. I stared at her, watching her face fall, tears slowly beginning to stream down her face. I hate seeing her cry over me, even if she does look beautiful doing it. I softly caressed her cheek, wiping away a few of her tears in the process, I'm sorry; I just can't let you in yet…not yet. She looked at me with those sad eyes, god how I love her eyes. They just take me away from this pain that I have inside of me, I can notice nothing else when I look into them. Before I new it, I began to kiss her, unable to let the last of her words roll off of her tongue.

I lay there, clutching on to her, I listened as she began to softly breathe in her sleep, her hand falling from my hair, onto the bed. I continued to lie there, listening to her breathe before sitting up to stare down upon her. I began to softly caress her hair.

She stayed! For a year she stayed by my side, patiently waiting. Trying to give me the space and time she thought I needed, but still showing me she was there. She had given me all of her, I felt it in everything we did together, and all she wanted was, at least, part of me.

She's starting to doubt our relationship along with her role in my life. I can slowly feel her slipping away. I can't lose her, but I can't let her in. I brushed my lips against hers, watching her toss and turn on her side. I laid back down, pulling her closer to me, wrapping her tightly in my arms.

"I'm sorry." I whispered into her hair before drifting off.


	2. Beginning Of The End

The next morning I woke to find the spot next to me completely empty. This was odd; she never woke before me, never. I sighed, rubbing me eyes of sleep before glancing around the room, in hopes that maybe she was still here. I heard a rummaging sound coming from a corner, slowly I sat up. There she was, pulling on her pants, never once noticing that my eyes were now on her. Will she truly be in for the long hall after I open up to her? Does she even still want to be with me after distancing her for so long? I sighed from just thinking these questions.

"What are you doing? Why don't you come back to bed?" I patted the empty spot next to me, a yawn escaped me.

"I can't I'm late as it is…"

"Late for what? Tohma gave everyone the day off…considering the fact that Mika went into labor. We can spend all day here…in bed." Her hair concealed her expression, but it didn't stop me from sensing it…fear?

"I can't do that…if I don't show up for the bands meeting Kio-chan will have my head" A shiver seemed to creep it's why down her spine. I rose from my position, making my way over to her and wrapping my arms around her. I kissed her softly on the shoulder blade.

"I'm sure Kioshi wouldn't mind if you were a bit late…or absent…" I grinned as I brushed my lips softly over her neck, she started to tense.

"How so…it's not like she knows about us. No one knows about us…I'm just your little secret…" she pushed away from me, turning to face me, her expression more visible than ever. "…right!"

"Naomi…" I was completely taken aback by her response. She started moving backward towards the door, further away from me.

"I-I can't…I can't do this anymore." Before I knew it she had made a dash out of the room towards the living room. I followed her, the whole time trying to stop her and understand 'why now?' Why now did she decide to give up on us? I grabbed her by the arm before she could even make her way out of my apartment…my life.

"Don't…" That's all I could say at that moment, that's all I could think of saying, I didn't expect this.

"Ryu…let me go…I can't do this anymore. I can't be your little secret because for whatever reason you refuse to love me. I can't be with someone who doesn't want me, doesn't acknowledge my presence except when we're alone." At just hearing those words I let her go. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake; I was an idiot to let her get this close. Who was I to think that my demons would leave me alone and allow me happiness. No, she's just like the others.

"Get out."

"Wh-what?" She looked at me, confused at the change of situation.

"You wanted to leave then leave...you're meaningless to me anyway..." With that I turned my back to her, making for my bedroom once more.

"SO THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO DO? RUN FROM YOU'RE PROBLEMS? YOU'RE MISTAKES?" I stopped dead in my tracks, frozen by her words. "God! I tried okay...I tried to be there for you...to love you and give you time...blindly and stupidly hoping that you would finally let go and open up to me...love me...and now I know I was an idiot. I expected you to let go, to be a fucking man and deal with your problems, but the truth of the matter is...you don't want to. No...you like being in pain...living in this closed world...playing the victim. Why else would you still be here? Like this..." My anger had taken over, before I knew it she was pinned in-between me and the wall, the fear showing in her eyes.

"Don't you even dare try to act like you know me...know what I've been through. Just because your little feelings are hurt about you meaning nothing to me...except for a good lay every now and then...doesn't mean you can say what ever the hell you want..." I had done it...made her cry. I turned my back to her again, frustrated with this situation and myself. I heard the door close behind me.

I paced one spot over and over in my living room my anger building more and more. What the hell does she now about pain? About loss? Nothing...that's right nothing. I picked up the nearest object to me and flung it at the wall, the sound of it shattering to pieces bringing a little ease to my mind, but it wasn't enough. I continued to break object after object, each bringing me to so form of calmness. Before I knew it I was surrounded by a room of now useless, broken objects...alone.


	3. A Love Turned To Fear

A/N: I know these chapters are short and it seem to be taking my sometime posting new ones...but I'm still getting my bareings together with this story and feeling it out...figuring just exactly where I want this story to go...

**Naomi's POV**

I don't know how things ended up here, at this point. I just remember getting dress to leave, afraid that if I showed up late for another one of our band meetings Kio-chan was going to have my head. I don't know why I snapped at him…I don't know. I think part of me wanted this whole mess to be over with to move on from the pain this relationship was causing me, but the other half…The other half wanted this to be the breaking point needed, for him to open up in fear that if he didn't he would lose someone he cared for.

Not this, not for him to treat me like some common groupie that warmed his bed. Before I knew it I was saying things out of anger and pain.

I wiped away my tears with the back of my hand, jumping at the sound of something shattering on the other side of the door. I turned, debating if I should go back in and check on him because in the end I still loved and worried about him. I sighed, staring at the door, listening to item after item being broken before there was dead silence, and it scared me.

I went to reach for the knob, only to hear the sound of his muffled voice getting louder and before I knew it, he was standing there glaring at me. There was so much anger in his eyes that I was afraid to look him in the eyes.

"What are you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to leave?" He towered over me for a second before violently shoving me into a wall, pinning me there with the weight of his body.

"Ryu…"

"What did you think I was going to run after you?" He grabbed me roughly by the wrist, his eyes becoming so dark with rage that for the first time in my life I was afraid of him and what he might do to me. "Did you think that I was going to be your knight in fucking shinning armor?"

"Ryu…you're hurting me…" His grip on my wrist tightened even more, I winced at the pain. I was too afraid to stop my tears from shedding. "Ryu…"

I thought I saw his face soften and change to that of disgust at what he was doing. Slowly he let go of my wrist, combing his fingers through his hair as he tried to justify what he had just done. He looked at me with so much hurt in his eyes, his apology hanging in his tears. He tried to touch me, tried to comfort me, apologize, but I couldn't bear to look at him, let alone have him touch me. Before I knew it I had taken off, not even bothering to look back.


	4. Misery Of The Heart

Chapter 4: Misery Of The Heart 

Ryu's POV

What have I done? Who have I become? I never meant to hurt her, not like that. I never wanted her to be afraid of me…never. Just something about seeing her on the other side of that door…standing there as if none of my words from earlier affected her…angered me. No, she looked concerned, worried about me and seeing that in those eyes that I've grown so attach to, those eyes that have done nothing but bring me peace…angered me even more.

I didn't want peace, I didn't want her worry, I wanted to…

"Ryu?" My thoughts were cut short at the sound of Tohma's voice calling me. I don't like the tone of it. That tone matches perfectly with the look in her eyes…those eyes… I mentally shake the thought of them out of my head. It's over, done and it's all my fault. Sighing, I turn my head to connect the face with the voice. His face matches his tone…I don't want to listen. I want another drink.

"Ryu, you've had enough." He takes the glass full of contents that have yet to join it's nine other colleagues within my stomach. "This isn't like you. Will you finally tell me what the hell happened?" He takes a seat on the stool next to me. I roll my eyes and look ahead. I don't want to hear this, none of it. I don't want to talk, I don't want comfort. I deserve none of it. What I deserve, is this right here. Me.alone.drinking away my misery. I've deserved it since day one, since that night…when… "Ryu? Is it Naomi? Did something happen with you and Naomi?"

I clinch my jaw. That name, it's like poison to me now. "What makes you think that anything has to do with that _girl_? Shouldn't you be at home with your new bundle of joy?" I glance towards his direction. "Don't tell me you got bored with the thing after only a week."

I hear him shift next to me. "That _thing_ is my daughter and she has a name. More importantly, one of my closest friends, band mate, and artist has been either seating at home mopping or at a bar drinking his self blind for the past week. It's only natural for me to be concerned and want to help."

"Well…don't. I don't need your help…or anyone else's" I slide off my stool, ready to head for the door. Only I feel Tohma's fingers tightly wrapped around my upper arm.

"If you don't let go of what happened…" My anger took over me and before I know it I have him roughly by his shirt collar. Wrinkling his purple button up and knocking that stupid hat off his head in the process.

"Don't you dare. Don't you _fucking_ dare."  
"Dare what, Ryu? Tell you the truth? Let it go, it happened and there was nothing…"

"SHUT UP!" I don't want to hear this.

"…you could do about it." Yes, I could. I could've done something. I know it…it's my fault. I shove him away, combing my fingers through my hair. I want to rid myself of these memories, of this pain. I can't be here anymore, not around him.

I realize that I haven't been breathing and I take a breath. I stare at the blonde before me, shaking my head.

"You seemed to have lost Naomi because of all this. Just let it all go…let _her_ go before you lose even more…" My fist connected with his chin. I've had it with him thinking he has the fucking answer to everything. Fuck him.

"Just because you seem to be the only one that knows about my past or what little bitch I decide to fuck on a regular doesn't mean you have a say in shit. We're band mates and you are the president of my record label…that's it. We're not friends, we're not family, worry about your own life and stay the fuck out of mine." I shove my way through the doors, climb on to my waiting bike, let the engine roar, and take off down the road opposite of my empty complex.


End file.
